I’m getting married next Friday, sir. Can I have the day off?
Married! No women would marry you unless she was mad! Who are you marrying?
It was a very hot afternoon and David was having trouble keeping his eyes open.
David, wake up, you can’t sleep in class, shouted the teacher.
David lifted his head from his desk and said:
Well, sir, if you didn’t talk so loudly, I’m sure I would be able to!
If my brothers don’t leave home soon, I’ll have to look for somewhere else to stay. One has six cats; another has four dogs; and my youngest brother has three pigs!
So what’s the problem?
We all live in one room and the smell is terrible.
Why don’t you open the window?
What! And lose all my pigeons?
Young lady: If I don’t kiss you, will you kill yourself?
Young man: That’s what I usually do.
I’d like a return ticket to Cairo, please.
There you are. That’s $500.
Oh, I’d also like a ticket for Oninda.
Is that in Nigeria? I can’t issue a ticket if I don’t know where it is!
I’m sorry, Oninda is my daughter’s name.
I’m afraid that the cut on your arm won’t stop bleeding unless I put some stitches in it.
Go ahead, doctor.
(After some time) There you are. Eighteen stitches.
Thanks, doctor. Can I ask one more thing?
Certainly, what is it?
Could you sew the hole in my shirt while you’ve got your needle and thread out?
I’d like to try on that dress in the window if I may.
I’m sorry, madam. You can’t – not unless you use the fitting room like everyone else!
Categories: In English / Bahasa Inggris