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All our jokes listing within the Mental health jokes category are listed below. Click on any of the items to view the full joke.

31.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
Doctor, I have a ringing in my ears.Dont answer!... more

32.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
Fred: "Why are you so upset?" Harry: "My wife introduced me to her psychiatrist this morning." Fred: "So what?" Harry: "... more

33.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How do you tell the difference between the staff and the inmates at a psychiatric hospital?The patients get better and l... more

34.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How many Borderline P.D. does to take to change a lightbulb?Just one. To threaten suicide if you dont change it for him/... more

35.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How many Dependent P.D. does to take to change a lightbulb?None, hes still clinging to the old lightbulb.... more

36.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How many Histrionic P.D. does to take to change a lightbulb?"You want me to change the lightbulb? I could burn my hand!... more

37.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How many Obsessive-Compulsive P.D. does to take to change a lightbulb?Just one. But he has to check it 100 times, one fo... more

38.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How many Passive Aggressive P.D. does to take to change a lightbulb?Oops.I cant believe I broke the last one. I guess yo... more

39.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? "How long have you been having this phantasy?"... more

40.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? "Why does the light bulb necessarily have to change?"... more

41.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? One, but he must consult the DSM-IV.... more

42.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How many psychoanalysts does it take to change a light bulb?"How many do you think it takes?"... more

43.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but it takes nine visits.... more

44.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb? Just one, but the light bulb really has to want to change.... more

45.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?None. The light bulb will change itself when its ready.... more

46.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
In a psychiatrists waiting room two patients are having a conversation. One says to the other, "Why are you here?"The se... more

47.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
Joe has been seeing a psychoanalyst for four years for treatment of the fear that he had monsters under his bed. It had... more

48.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
Mary was having a tough day and had stretched herself out on the couch to do a bit of what she thought to be well-deserv... more

49.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two ba... more

50.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
One behaviorist to another after lovemaking: "Darling, that was wonderful for you. How was it for me?"... more

51.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
One out of every four people is suffering from some form of mental illness. Check three friends. If theyre OK, then its... more

52.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
Patient: Doctor, I get the feeling that people dont give a hoot about anything I say. Psychiatrist: So?... more

53.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
Patient: Doctor, my wife thinks Im crazy because I like sausages. Psychiatrist: Nonsense! I like sausages too.Patient: G... more

54.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
Patient: Doctor, you must help me. Im under such a lot of stress, I keep losing my temper with people.Doctor: Tell me ab... more

55.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
Patient: Im really depressed. Therapist: I see. Yes. You are depressed. Patient: Nothing is going well. Therapist: Nothi... more

56.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
Patient: Why did you charge me a group rate?Psychiatrist: Youve got multiple personalities.... more

57.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
Psychiatrist to his nurse: "Just say were very busy. Dont keep saying Its a madhouse."... more

58.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
Psychiatrist to Internal Revenue agent on couch: "Nonsense! No way does everyone in the world hate you -- everyone in th... more

59.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
Psychiatrist: Well, whats your problem? Patient: I prefer brown shoes to black shoes.Psychiatrist: Theres nothing wrong... more

60.   Category: Mental health jokes  0 stars
The aspiring psychiatrists were attending their first class on emotional extremes. "Just to establish some parameters,"... more





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