It is Always the Asshole That is in Charge
The organs of the body were having a meeting, trying to decide who was in charge. Each organ took a turn to speak up:
Brain: I should be in charge because I run all body functions.
Blood: I should be in charge because I circulate oxygen for the brain.
Stomach: I should be in charge because I process food to the brain.
Legs: I should be in charge because I take the brain where it wants to go.
Eyes: I should be in charge because I let the brain see where it’s going.
Asshole: I should be in charge because I get rid of your waste.
All the other parts laughed so hard and this made the asshole very mad. To prove his point, the asshole immediately slammed tightly closed and stayed that way for 6 days, refusing to rid the body of any waste whatsoever.
Day 1 - Brain got a terrible headache and cried out for relief.
Day 2 - Stomach got bloated and began to ache terribly.
Day 3 - Legs got cramps and became unstable.
Day 4 - Eyes became watery and vision became blurred.
Day 5 - Blood became toxic and poisoned the body.
Day 6 - The other organs agreed to let the asshole be in charge.
MORAL OF THE STORY: “NO MATTER WHO YOU ARE, OR HOW IMPORTANT YOU THINK YOU ARE, YOU WILL FIND THAT IT IS ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE THAT IS IN CHARGE”.
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